Candle's Good, Bad, And Ugly (BFG IV)

Hello everyone in Blogger Land! (That is, if anyone is actually reading this. Start pimping me, Strata!) and welcome to my slightly gimmicked analysis of TNA's biggest Pay-Per-View of the year, Bound For Glory. What's going to happen here is I'm going to put the events of the evening in three categories; the good and the bad, which are self explanatory, and the ugly, which can range from the ridiculously terrible, to the sickest bumps of the night, and trust me, there's plenty to put in this category coming off the heels of BFG IV. So, without further ado, let's hop into this somewhat shallow analysis.

-The Good-

Attendance: TNA delivered on a promise, in my eyes anyway. They practically sold out the Chicago venue, and frankly, it was the biggest paying crowd I've ever seen at a TNA event. Kudos for building a major PPV card that was strongly hyped and big enough to draw in a huge crowd. In this sense, TNA's Bound For Glory lived up to it's hype.

The Never Disappointing Opening Match: TNA has a history of booking a strong card for BFG, and at the base of it every year is an otherwise show stealing (and usually X Division highlighting) performance that sets the bar, and ultimately the tone, for the rest of the evening. While I'm not a huge fan of the Steel Asylum, and see through it's paper thin purpose of shoving the entire X Division on the card at last minute (Along with Eric Young, whom I don't consider an X Division Star), I can't deny that this match was good. It was spotty, but that's what it's there for. We saw a sweet Spicy Drop/Rack, some great tag stuff from the Machine Guns, and an awesome finish with Lethal and Dutt that, I hope, drives the final nail in their feud's coffin. Other spots include a sweet Divine Intervention from Johnny Devine (who knew he had a finisher?) and a running Canadian Destroyer from the master of the flip piledriver, Petey Williams. Honestly, there are too many great spots in this match to even mention. Even Shark Boy got one in with a double falling Chummer from the top rope. Let's not forget the modified hurricanrana tower of doom! Once again, the X Division shows that they're the guys who built TNA, and still make up it's foundation today.

Monster's Ball: I was stoked to see an 8 Man Tag Monster's Ball, and it didn't fail to deliver. The VIP's of this bout were definitely Brother Ray, LAX, and Abyss. The Dudley pulled out some great ECW spots, including Ray licking a bloody cheese grater, flaming tables, and some new school thumbtacked tables. Brother Ray as a whole made this match for me. He's one of the most underrated charismatic guys of our time, and I think it has a lot to do with him being restricted to tag work. LAX weren't slouches either. Homicide solidified his worth in this match by showing just how vicious he could be when he laced into Brother Devon with a fork in such a way that I'm sure that Abdullah the Butcher would even flinch while watching. Hernandez showed why LAX was bound to break up at Homicide's expense someday as he put on a big man clinic for most of the bout, and then took a sick 3D through a tack laden table. And then we have The Monster Abyss. Everything he did in this match added flavor. I marked hard when he showed signs of weakness when he started childishly reaching for the bag of tacks, and who can forget that sick bump through that flaming table? I'm sure Chris Park wont. Matt Morgan was just there, and while he did impress with some huge spots, like an attempted Old School into a top rope Crossbody, and a flying crossbody to the outside, his futile attempts to garner attention were vastly overshadowed by Hernandez's amazing big man work. Beer Money had it's comedic moments (LOVED Storm's head gear) but were essentially just there to steal the win. I DID however liked their Enziguri/Block Buster spot, although I could have done without the comedic bits with Mongo...or Mongo as a whole...more on that later.

Christian Cage vs AJ Styles vs The Royal T: I honestly can't find one bad thing to say about this match. We saw a side of AJ Styles that we haven't seen in quite a while, an unpredictable Styles that makes you go "ooooh" and "ahhh". It was that seemingly impromptu AJ of old, who did small yet stunning things in the ring that made you take notice. My favorite spots of this match (and there were many good ones) had to have been AJ's misdirection springboard moonsault to the outside onto Cage, and his sequence with Book and Christian in the ring, which I couldn't even begin to explain in words, other than to say that Cage and AJ have some real chemistry. To the best of my abilities, I'll describe it as a backwards no-look roll over on a charging Cage by Styles. It wasn't an actual move, but a greatly timed diversion. Book and Double C weren't exactly dead weight in this bout either. TNA has really breathed new life into Booker T. His ring work is much more crisp, his demeanor seems enthusiastic, and his matches are better than they've ever been in my eyes. The last time I saw a Booker T like this was back in the Harlem Heat days when he first caught the eye of the WCW bookers. He just seems like he's shed 20 years of ring rust and career angst, and I love it. Cage, as always, proved that he is an asset to TNA's main event, and I don't think anything else needs to be said but that. Great spots included Cage fighting out of the Styling DDT, a double Axe Kick on Cage and AJ by Book, a flying middle rope unprettier, and of course the finishing blow on Cage by Booker, a flying Axe Kick. This was the best Triple Threat I've seen in a long time, and it takes a lot to impress me with a Triple Threat. The last ones I honestly liked were the series between Triple H, Shawn Michaels, and Chris Benoit back in, what?, '04? '06? And that was at two of my favorite PPV's of all time, Backlash and Wrestlemania. Bound For Glory is definitely my favorite TNA PPV, and this match will definitely solidify it's place in my heart. A true 5 Star performance.

Double J vs Kurt Angle (Special Enforcer: Mickles "Cactus" Foley Kind Love or How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Dude [take that Peter Sellers!]): Okay, enough with my Strangelove for Foley, this match rocked. How anyone doubted the ability of Jeff Jarrett is beyond me. There weren't any real notible spots, outside of the finish, but this was some good, clean, old school wrestling that can't be beat with a stick (but definitely with a guitar). We saw a clinic from Angle, and perpetually no ring rust whatsoever on the King of the Mountain. Foley's presence was merely incidental for most of the match, and that's the way it should be. I know the purist are going to hate the finish, but every match tells a story, and in the eyes of this fan, like Terry Funk before him, Jeff Jarrett was wrestling for the soul of Mick Foley, so Foley's inevitable decision had to be made within the realm of this match to complete the story arc. Another 5 Star outing for this PPV card in my humble opinion. I'm not the type to toss around the term match of the year, but so far I've seen two in this Pay-Per-View alone, and this was one of them.

~The Bad~
Bimbo Brawl: Rhino/Rhaka/ODB vs The Beautiful People w/Kute Kip: This match is honestly only bad if you went into it expecting something great out of it, and I can honestly say that nobody did. This would have been a fine TV bout, but it didn't have a place on the Bound For Glory card. While I love Velvet and Angelina, Rhino and Kip aren't exactly the type to be headlining a Pay-Per-View. These are WWE midcarders, hell, they're TNA midcarders, and while I respect TNA for jam-packing the card with as many stars as possible, Bound For Glory should be a privilage EARNED by a year of good ring performances and note worthy feuds, and nobody in this match can really boast all of these things. Sure, Rhino and Kip are good enough workers, but there's no real heat for either of them, and sure, The Beautiful People have been the Knockout Division's anchor since the departure of Gail Kim, but their ring work just pales in comparrison to their peers, even though their mic work is better than anyone elses within this bout. Rhaka's just started to wrestle in TNA, and she's very green. Yes, I know it's not her first picnic, but it might as well be considering how she's wrestled so far. ODB's good for some fan heat, and a few Big Girl spots (PS- I'm coining the phrase "Big Girl," in light of Kong and Phoenix. Patent Pending) but other than that, she really can't throw a great match together unless she's in there with someone who can string all of those power moves together. This bout was a major crowd killer coming off of the heels of the wonderful opener, but I do maintain that this is a passible free match. It wasn't as bad as it could have been.

X Division Match- Bashir vs Creed: Sooooo much build for Creed, only to pull the typical, and yes, I hate to say it, Russo move and pull the swerve heel finish. We've had rough cuts, we had a special entrance, we had everything that pointed to Consequence's arrival at the Apex of the X Division. We saw PROMISE of this title becoming relevant again, and it was all dashed by one of the worst rollups I've ever seen. Creed's shoulder was a foot off of the mat when the final 3 count was patted on the mat. I don't think I would mind this match as much if they'd actually give Bashir a clean win with a FINISHER, something we've yet to see out of him. I get it, he's a heel, but cheap tight-pull school boys are only going to work so many times before your opponent starts to see it coming, and the ref begins to look for it. Otherwise, this was a solid bout. Creed showed his worth, and Bashir continued his passable, but somewhat mediocre move set. I guess what bugs me about Bashir the most is the simple fact that he's so basic. Everyone in the X Division has something about their wrestling style that sets them apart from everyone on the roster, and Bashir doesn't have that, and it's somehow a reflection unto his character. There's something about him that really screams two dimensional. I want to see some of that pent up rage for America come out in the ring. The closest we've seen to this was the Tiger Jeet Singh Belt Swing two weeks ago, which looked awesome, and original to the unsavvy fan (that is, if Tenay would shut his mouth). I want to see an angry Arab-American, and Bashir just hasn't delivered that in the ring, and it's hurting his character.

The Knockout Title Match: Tayler Wilde vs Roxxi vs Kong: This was easily the most disappointing bout on the card, and it wasn't anybodies fault but the bookers. Six minutes...that's all they were given to work with, and while I've heard that they delivered a good match within that 6 minutes, I missed it all while switching to a downstairs TV during the entrance of all of the women. When my friends and I finally got to a TV that allowed us to continue to watch this great PPV, we turn it on to find Foley in Cornette's office telling Borash Jim Ross stories. I'm really angry about two things; that I missed out on what was probably a great 6 minutes of women's wrestling, and that it was for the prestigious Knockout Title and lasted SIX MINUTES! I really don't want to see the division hit the back burner like the X Division has in recent years, because it's the hottest thing TNA has going for it right now, and the ratings have more than proven this. More people tune in to see the women's wrestling in TNA, it's rated higher than any other aspect of the show in recent months, so why blow this clinic? Why miss out on the chance to boast two phenomenal Triple Threat matches in one night? Especially when one's highlighted with women's wrestling!?! I'm also not happy that Wilde retained. She's the biggest problem with the division right now. I'm not going to say she's a bad wrestler, because she isn't a bad wrestler, she's a great wrestler, but nobody cares about her as a character. People care about Roxxi. People respect Roxxi because Roxxi has sacrificed her well being, and hair, for TNA on multiple occasions. Why not make her the Joan of Arc for the KO Division? She's already got the haircut! It just stings me so bad that after the rough cuts, the sacrifice, and the build up of Roxxi over the past month or so, they blow it. Face it TNA, you need a new face for the division, and Kim might not be coming back, and Tayler Wilde, while very sweet and friendly, just doesn't cut the mustard with the fans. Either make her pay her dues, or push her aside and let Roxxi do that voodoo she do so well.

TNA World Title Bout: Samoa Joe vs Sting: From a wrestling standpoint, this match delivered in spades. From a booking standpoint it worked as well, but something just rubs me raw about this match, and I can't place my finger on it. Joe went in and dominated into the crowd (which was brilliant on TNA's part. They got to show off the empty seats...all two of them...in the nose bleed section...which were apparently reserved for Joe's left and right foot, but more on that later). Joe dominated throughout the bout as well. This was purly 18 minutes of Samoa Joe handing Sting his grease painted ass on a platter, and that's great booking considering Sting's done nothing but jack his jaw for months on end without backing up his words while Joe busts his ass night in and night out. Joe was beating some deserved respect into Sting, and that translated well. They both traded and no-sold each other's finishers, which was an awesome rub for Joe, and classic 'Stingin' Up' by Borden, and Joe KILLED Sting with what I consider the biggest spot of the night, a coast-to-coast dropkick in the audience, which resulted in Joe BARELY clearing the stair railing, and nearly killing himself on the cement steps. As far as wrestling goes, this bout delivered, even if it was almost a prolonged squash lacking the resulting pinfall victory. I'm even fine with Nash coming out and costing Joe the victory, but it feels like his interference lacked...I don't know...build. Don't get me wrong, Nash and Joe have a sordid relationship, and they have their history, but Nash has sort of been absent from television for quite some time, maybe over a month. Maybe that was the plan, maybe TNA was hoping that this would be a major swerve appearance, and in a way, it was, but more like in the way that most fans were scratching their heads and wondering if Nash pulled a Spinal Tap and got lost backstage. I suppose people can call this a good match, and I wont be offended or disagree, because it was, but something about it just doesn't set right with me...maybe it's the inevitable bout between Joe and Nash that we'll undoubtedly be forced to pay for in order to see better wrestling matches at No Surrender, or maybe it's the fact that Joe doesn't get his rematch clause. I'm not going to sit here and say that Sting's not a good champion for the company, because he is, but I guess I'll miss the reign of Joe.

#The Ugly#

Goodness Gracious Monster's Ball of Fire!: Damnit Chris Park, haven't you heard of Stop, Drop, And Roll!?! Abyss really took this bump badly, and it was quite obvious that his unprotected arms took the brunt of this bump. Reports right now say that his arms were miraculously the only part of his body that suffered burns. There's no word on how severe the burns really are, but considering what I saw, which was about eight seconds of burning arm flesh, they've got to be at least second or third degree. Either way, I guarantee that he'll carry the scars from this match the rest of his life. I hope he's OK, and wish that the ringside guys would have been quicker to react with the fire extinguisher. It's partially Abyss's fault for not rolling, but who really has the right sense of mind when their entire upper body is engulfed with fire?

LAX Eats TAX: Okay, I admit, cheap joke, but damn Hernandez! A stomach full of tacks can't be fun, and considering he flopped like a fish and dotted up his back as well doesn't spell out a good evening for Shawn Hernandez, not to mention the fact that Roode also piled up on him for the cover. While this is a minor injury, it's note worthy, because if those were indeed real tacks, Hernandez spent the majority of the rest of the evening picking them out of his back and stomach. See, the usual beauty of a tack spot is if you're wearing a shirt, you can avoid some penetration, and ultimately pull every tack out with one foul yank of your shirt tail...Hernandez...doesn't have that inclination, because Hernandez took off his wife beater halfway into the bout. Kudos to Shawn for taking such a sickening bump that, no doubt, cost him a backstage ticket to the Pay-Per-View.

Oh Waitress, I Asked For My Devon Well Done, But He's A Bit Pink In The Middle: Holy shazbot! What the fork was Homicide thinking!?! That was simply a brutal display of sacrifice on Devon's part to sit there and take so many jabs to the face. To all wrestling haters who believe the sport is totally fake, try sitting through Homicide exfoliating Devon's forehead with silverware. Kudos to Devon for showing that he can take it just as sickly as he can dish it out, and major props to Homicide for having the juevos to do it so viciously.

Another Kind Of Ugly: Continuing the trend of harping on the Monster's Ball, I'd like to point out how horrible Steve McMichael is at reffing. His fast counts were normal speed, his slow counts were slower than a snail on speed, and his spot with Beer Money made me want them to speed up the match. Let's keep Mongo out of wrestling, folks. He made a bad horseman, and he made a worse ref. And my god did he look like he was a hoagie short of being Jarred pre-Subway.

Foley Eats Chairs For Breakfast: EPIC no-sell by Foley. I just thought that was worth mentioning, and it even seemed like he took the brunt of the chair shot in Foley hardway fashion, and then acted as if it were an afterthought only moments later. Only Mickles could do this and not be considered an egomaniac, because HE'S HARDCORE! HE'S HARDCORE!

In-Bound Flight To Samoa: Holy hell did Joe fly! The only thing ugly about this was the turbulent landing of Air Joe. He seemingly cracked the back of his skull on the steps, and then sat up with a really annoyed look on his face...not dazed, ANNOYED! As if to say "Shit, can't believe I did that." Ladies and gentlemen of the internet, if I wasn't mortified of the Samoan Stiffing Machine before tonight, I sure as hell am now. The man's indestructable!

Overall, I'd give this PPV an 8 out of 10. It had it's bad match, it's unnecessary match, it's poorly timed match, and it's epic battles. Overall Bound For Glory failed to disappoint. I'm sure it'll have it's retracters, but all TNA events do. They're called WWE marks and ROHbots

Anyway, that's all for now folks. I hope to get something else up this week, as soon as I figure out what to write about. Right now I'm getting into the groove of a job, so odds are this might be it for me this week. Cross your fingers loyal reader (I say "reader" because I'm assuming there's one of you...if I'm lucky...PIMP ME OUT STRATA!)

Until Next Time, I'm Out Like A Candle